You had to go and do that right? Ganondorf is one of my old school video game crushes, and now I have to pit him against the classiest sniper badass who ever lived?
I’ll answer this logically and calmly.
Garrus sprinted down one of the large elegant halls of the legendary castle Hyrule, sniper in hand. Not even the bloody mangled corpse of a boy clad in green distracted him from his goal: Ganondorf.
"That bastard," he snarled. "No one steals my visor."
As Garrus burst into the throne room, Ganondorf did not sit before him, cushioned in the luxury of a comfy seat, no, he hovered high above the room, arms crossed with a smug grin on his face, clearly expecting the angered Turian.
Garrus didn’t even hesitate as he brought his rifle up and fired a round so quickly, Ganondorf barely had the chance to evade.
"Silly little boy," he chuckled, "The world burns, your hero is dead, and I have your fancy little pimp monocle to boot. This truly is a glorious day." Ganondorf mocked him.
"Your M.Bison impersonation is weak there, Ganondork. I’ve fought Pyjaks more intimating." Garrus spat.
Ganondorf merely grinned and hurled one of his infamous balls of light straight at Garrus. But he was ready for it; if the endless hours with Link taught him anything, it was that Ganondorf was predictable and hardly a challenge.
He swung his rifle like a bat and the tennis match began.
"Why do you even need this visor, boy? Seems you have no issue in battle without it. I think you just like to look like a pimp ass muther ‘cause it makes all the ladies swoon for you." Ganondorf continued to provoke him in hopes he’d slip up.
"If that is the case, it’s certainly not doing you any good." Garrus retaliated.
"SILENCE!" Ganondorf shouted as the great ball of light came rushing towards Garrus with even more might.
"Hit a soft spot did I?!" Garrus yelled back to him over the loud crackling sizzle of the ball as it hit his sniper, "Is that the real reason for your tyranny? The ladies back home cant stand the sight of a green skinned, orange haired troll?"
"I don’t need those bitches!"
"Not even that saucy Nabooru? Maybe that’s why you hated Link so badly. He was a ladies’ man, just like me!"
"You know nothing!" Ganondorf’s final swing rushed the ball of concentrated magic towards Garrus like a speeding meteor punching a whole in the atmosphere. The light was so intense Garrus’ eyes teared in pain and he put his arms up in a hopeless attempt to block it.
To be continued. Never.
<Please insert coin>
Nintendo Soap cartridges
I WAS PANICKING THE WHOLE TIME BEFORE I REALIZED IT WAS SOAP WHAT
I WANT TO RUB MEGA MAN ALL OVER MY NAKED BODY I’M GOING TO CRYthank god, i was getting reallyupset as i scrolled nd then i read the captions
wow this was so concerning for a moment hahaha
“I WANT TO RUB MEGA MAN ALL OVER MY NAKED BODY I’M GOING TO CRY” omg I had to make sure that wasn’t posted by neolucky
I KNOW WHAT I WANT FOR XMAS.
kayin knows me too well. a little too well. he knows my secrets and hopes and dreams, and even what will get me to reblog something. when it comes to rubbing megaman all over my body, i’m kind of an expert.